Asking for Help (part 1)

by on September 26, 2019

I went to a gas station yesterday morning; a self-serve station that I frequent. I got out of my car, swiped my card and began doing my thing. A man came out of the station and apologized for not being out here to help. I looked up at the sign and said, “isn’t this self-serve?” ⁣
“Yes, but I like to come out and help the customers.”⁣

Now, let me preface the rest by saying it was very clear that he was just being kind and helpful.⁣
I was so close to just politely declining and telling him that I was all set as I’ve pumped my own gas so many times before. Instead, I caught myself, remembering that I want to be open to receiving as much as I give.⁣

I give a lot. ⁣

“Thank you, that’s so nice of you!” I said. He asked if I would need a receipt afterwards, and I told him I wouldn’t. ⁣
I got back into my car and waited. As soon as the pump clicked off, the man came right back out to finish things up. ⁣


Thoughts ran through my mind:⁣
I wonder if he offers to only help the ladies and not the men? ⁣
I wonder if he thought I looked like I wouldn’t know how to pump my own gas?⁣

Just thoughts. Whatever HIS thoughts or reasoning was isn’t my business. His interaction style was nothing but kind and respectful. ⁣

I went on thinking:⁣
Some people have an even harder time accepting gestures of kindness. I get it. What’s the intent behind the act? Is it because they think I’m not good enough? Do they think they’re better than me? Do they assume I don’t know how to do this myself? What if it’s to then think they can expect something in return?!

And then I realized this:⁣

👉🏽Just as someone’s thoughts and feelings aren’t my business or my responsibility, their expectations aren’t my concern either. 👈🏽⁣

In addition, the allowing someone to give is also a gift. ⁣

So, when it feels right, I will accept help and gifts. Even if I don’t “need” it. I won’t make excuses or justify. I will politely accept and truly be open to receiving.⁣

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